It is the small things that make your heart stop ..Day 319+

You all know you have done it.. you all have enjoyed that crazy rush when you were young and you ran up to a friends door late at night not to actually talk with them but to DING DONG DITCH them. You giggled, you ran, you hid... you had a blast doing it.
I am now that parent who hates ding dong ditching. I find it to be mean and unthoughtful. I say this because to a military spouse whose husband is deployed, it is. This is how it feels on the other side of the door. It is 11pm or later, and you are beginning to tire. You have just sent an email to your husband telling him how much you miss him and worry about his safety.  You have checked on the kids and they are all sound asleep.  The doorbell rings... instant fear creeps in to your head and your heart drops to your stomach. You slowly walk to the door not wanting to open it up, not wanting to see who is on the other side. You know your kids are in and safe. You know that no one should be ringing the bell so late unless....... unless it is for some horrible reason, this could be the notification about your husbands life.

No matter how much I keep myself protected by my bubble, no matter how much I pretend..... the fear of that notification stays buried deep in my mind until I get to hold Bill again, until I get to touch him, smell him and see his smile. 
That being said.... I hate ding dong ditchers... I appeal to every parent out there to explain the fear that this game places on ones heart late at night. It could be notification of a loved ones death, it could be the boogeyman.... these are the only two options the pre deployment brief prepared me for!
I beg of you all to remind these pranksters, as fun as it is and as exhilarating the rush may be... the heartache and fear they have invoked on the other side of the door is unmeasurable. Their friend whom they think they are doing it to...does not even hear it, for he is asleep and dreaming. The parent, however, will not sleep that night or any night until they hear from their spouse. For some, this could be weeks and others may only wait a day or two.

I am not going to sit idly by and allow this to keep happening and after a great suggestion by a friend......... beware! She suggested that I alter my doorbell so it has the ability to give a jolt or two. Not enough to place permanent harm to someone but enough to make them not want to press it again.  The pranksters, the bogeyman and the CACO (casualty assistance calls officer aka person notifying you of a death... the real bogeyman) all deserve a shock or two. My heart will have already had one if they arrive. To my friends and neighbors, please knock.... I would hate that my doorbell shocked you!

Bill-
Stay safe... thus far I have kept the bogeyman at bay. I am calling housing on Monday to see if they can offer me some assistance with my doorbell project. I know you worry about my safety when I begin working with electrical power.
Be sure to NOT ring the doorbell when you come home!!!!

The parents...aka granparents leave tomorrow .. Day 321+

My parents leave tomorrow after 10 glorious days of having help. My dad was up early with the kids... I hate mornings. He made the kids their lunches and always prefaced it with, "you know kids when I leave you are back to doing this yourself, do not expect your mom to."  Gotta love that my dad knows me well. He would greet me quietly every morning... basically he would nod until after I had my first cup of coffee. Gotta love him for knowing me well.
My mom played games with the kids and helped them do their homework every night. I did not have to sit and hear phonetic sounds emulating out of my daughter as she tried to sound out words she did not know. This requires patience and on some days when I am just done.... this can be a task. My mom made homemade chicken soup and beef stew....yum!!  My parents took us out for dinner twice, this is a treat and one I love!
Based on what I have said above.. I was pampered for 10 whole days.. I had someone taking care of the kids in the mornings and someone taking care of them in the evenings. I sure hope I do not go through parent withdrawal like I did Bill withdrawal. It is a good thing I have the whole weekend of running around with soccer and basketball and cheer to remind me of how hectic my life is.

Thank you mom and dad.... I have loved every minute. Thank you Dad for doing chores off the honey do list... wait...I think Bill should be saying thanks for that one.

Bill-
No worries, as much as I loved having my parents here to help.... I am not packing up and moving to Florida quite yet.  I will be here waiting for your return. I only ask that you do not resort to the "thunder bottles".  I refuse to allow that into my home upon your return. Be careful and stay safe.... let me know if dietary fiber is needed in your quest for the small things in life.

Parent meeting with the teachers... this is a rant!!! ....Day 321+

I believe I am the most ineffective parent when it comes to teacher conferences, especially when it truly matters. I met with my freshman's honor teachers yesterday to discuss his grade and to ask for them to assist me in his learning. I find it sad that I had to ask, but I believe that these two teachers are the ones that we all hated in school. You know the ones, they find one pet and that is the only A they give. I believe they grade harshly with the understanding that if a child wants a B...they will eat, sleep and dream only their subject. The learning I received from teachers such as this was..... that life is unfair, you do things to please another regardless of your belief, you struggle for no reason in a class that will mean absolutely nothing in 10 years (remember my rule of 10s).
I believe that these teachers do not have any child's best interest at heart and I believe that they are great at saying one thing and then reacting another. Maybe they can read my blog and fail me and my writing style. Maybe they will read my blog and do an inner search on how they teach. Maybe they will read my blog and remember what it was like to be in a class like theirs. Maybe they will find the truth about being an educator... that it should be about the student learning, it should be about helping a student, it should be about mentoring young minds.....not about proving how smart they are and how inept we parents are.

I know several of you Lejeune parents have encountered these two teachers... I know several have negative feelings. I truly have no negative feelings...I just want them to teach my son. I want them to truly want to see him excel. I want them to love their jobs...and if they do not then they should move on. This truly applies to all teachers...if you dislike what you do, you are doing a disservice to Americas youth!!! 


I was playing by the rules. I was sitting back waiting and watching you and trying to stay off your back like you asked in our first meeting. Now I am now going to be overly involved in my freshmans homework.. which I believe is a bad tactic seeing as how he has 4 years to figure things out before he heads to college. Thank you honors teachers for not assisting him in his growth in regards to personal time management, thank you for not taking the added interest in a child and allowing him to slip, thank you for pointing out it was my fault...I should have kept up on grade speed (online grade and assignment page), thank you for not taking that extra step with a child, thank you for not following through with what I asked on week 2 (I asked for you to help me help him stay on task and focused). I would have thought I need not spell out to you that an email when he has 3 late assignments would be nice.... I swear you asked me to step away from grade speed  and allow him time to manage his grade as a whole... I did my part and now his grade has suffered.
Thank you ...Thank you... Thank you.....

I have now decided that the DODEA school system has significant flaws.. I am not sure how I get them changed, but I will take any and all suggestions. I am willing to start the petition in regards to honors classes not being weighted. I am done watching children whom are intelligent and strive to better themselves by taking the harder course sit behind another whom took the easy class in regards to class rank. I am done with your thinking that kids are equal in grades in regards to honors class v. basic English or whatever subject.  I am done with your way of thinking that a college will see beyond the GPA and notice a honors course.There are several academic scholarships that require an 4.0 and above GPA and now our children will not be able to apply courtesy of your standard.  I am done with you thinking it is okay... I am just done.

I am also done with DODEA standards in regards to sports.... at what point did you lose sight of a well rounded child.  When did someone think that hiring a coach yearly would help the transient children of your school? How is it okay for our sports to not have daily practices and yet the coach does not lose pay for the day? Who said athletics ever worsened a child's behavior or mentality? Did you lose sight of how great a child's application for both college and scholarships looks when you see that they were part of extra curriculars. Did you lose sight that we have some great athletes among us and they are at a dis service when you provide nothing for them in regards to coaching and training. They may not receive an academic scholarship... so why are we not trying to enable those who can the opportunity to achieve an athletic one. At the high school level you should be allocating monies for any and all areas that can enable our children the opportunity for a higher level education. This does not always come in the form of only book education, it can come in the form of sports and in the arts. Wake up.... allow our high schools to be well rounded like you say you want our kids!!!!


I am willing to call and send emails daily to those in positions that can assess teaching styles that are ineffective and are causing our children to suffer. If you know where I should start..please let me know.
I have found a cause... trust me there are many.. .but one that is worth my fight is when it pertains to my kids.


Disclaimer:::  Some of the best teachers my kids have had are DODEA teachers. I truly love them for taking that extra step with all of their students, especially with mine. Thank you all.. you know who you are.
In regards to the teachers in my rant... I believe you both are wonderful teachers in your area of expertise.. I am hoping that you will now take that extra step in your teaching and show how much you care about your profession and your kids.